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Where did everyone go?
Topic Rating: +6 (6 votes) 
September 17, 2014
6:38 am
nemissary
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I have only recently frequented the forums, but it seems that the population has hit near zero.  Is there a problem that I am not aware of? Have so many people just bailed out on CoBM?  I love CoBM and the whole idea.  Just seems the net presence has disappeared.  It is even harder for us to get people to understand that the CoBM is spiritual etc. if we are not active at all.  I'm kinda bummed about the lack of activity.

 

I also noticed that at bodymod.org the majority of people have dropped off the face of the net over the last 2 years and somehow there are a ton of underage kids signing up for it each day in order to have a social network that their parents don't know about and don't track.  None of them have any mods of any sort and are just flooding the space with accounts for their own PMs to each other and to maybe look at genital piercings.  Weird…

 

Tribalectic seems to still be active for piercings, they are also a business/store but have a lot of good care/healing info available.

 

I'm just depressed at the lack of activity on CoBM and some sites that have related topics.  I'm really thinking of getting my 3 bars tattooed on my wrist and I probably will still do it even if this site dies out completely (I hope that never happens) because Body Mod is a spiritual journey for me and has added so much life back into my world as a terminally ill person.  When I pass it will be as a member of the CoBM and with a body that I have modified the way I want it to be modded and looking the way I want it to look.

 

Nevermind me.. just feeling a little melancholy this morning.

September 18, 2014
8:02 pm
dharmabean
Indiana
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I recently joined the church myself and was very exited to find a group of people that share the same beliefs as I do when it comes to modifying my body. I have noticed that there is not a lot going on with this website and I too wish there was more here. I did brand the three bars on my leg because I truly believe in this. even if the church disappeared the idea will live on forever. I don't us any other social media and I find it hard to do so in the first place. this gives me the opportunity to express my true self as I am without judgment or ridicule for the way I look. I believe that there is more to decorating the body then just self expression and pain brings enlightenment and not just agony when used it the right way. I want to know what my mind and body are capable of and I have found a spiritual awakening through these primitive acts of modification. we all do it in some shape or form whether it is cutting your hair and fingernails or sticking needles in our skin. I had to find my own path and that lead me here to this forum. It does feel good to get things out when you feel like know one is listening. I myself am not good with getting conversations started up but love to talk about anything in the body modification world. I want to know that there are others like me that want to see our minds grow and to have a place they can come to when everyone else gets them down for the things they do to be happy with their bodies. I hope that the human species continues to do these amazing things for the rest of our existence on earth.

September 19, 2014
3:59 am
nemissary
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Thanks for the post Dharmabean! :)

I really cannot properly express the huge amount of energy that has been channeled into my life by Body Modification.  I have struggled with metastatic (stage4 stuff) cancer for over 6.5 years now and was once told I had 6 months to live.  After my career was ended due to my health and I was constantly on huge amounts of drugs and treatments and painkillers for a few years, I eventually fell into severe depression for about 6 to 8 months I guess.  I didn't even hardly move from the couch and barely interacted with anyone, including my family.  Well, I snapped out of that and started to make things better in my personal life and kicked out most of the drugs, but still struggled. It wasn't until I took and active interest in supporting my oldest daughter's Piercing requests and ear stretching that things really started to spark in me again and I realized that I had been suppressing all my old Body Mod ideas etc.  When I took the dive and started large tattoo projects and then re-piercing areas, I really woke back up and started living again.  Now, I'm so alive and interested in all things about body mod, that I can't stop reading and planning things for myself.  My oldest daughter knows she has my 100% support and my wife is also working on her own projects with my help.  I can't wait to heal up from my last 5 piercings, so i can do some more (and I need to save more money too lol)  

 

 

September 21, 2014
11:58 am
SasQuatch9585
USA
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Speaking only for myself, I haven't been very active on the church site for the last couple years because they have been tempestuous and unstable.  I had been working a job that had very weird hours jumping between days and nights.  After I lost that job because of a positive drug test, I moved out of the state and reestablished myself in a new city, and have been getting by okay.  There was a lot of tension and uncertainty surrounding the move because I didn't have a job or a place to stay on the other end, but I had enough money to get here and survive for a couple months, so I went for it.  Got a job right away and found a place a few weeks later.  Everything worked out and now I'm just trying to save money for the next big oh-shit! situation.

 

I've been feeling disconnected from my spirituality over the last three years because of all the stress I've had to deal with over losing one job and then another, one relationship and then another, and another.  I've found it very essentially impossible to meditate deeply, and I've felt spiritually off-balance for about a decade now, I guess.  Now, however, I have moved over a thousand miles away from everyone that had been causing me stress and have removed those people from my life entirely.  It's only been about 9 or 10 months since the move, and of course, there's still some spiritual work I must do internally and externally to get myself back on-center, but I think the worst is over for me.

 

I'm stronger and wiser now than I ever was, and while I may never accomplish all my dreams, at least I know I'll die on the path that leads to them.

Sometimes I wonder if I can say anything in less than a hundred words.
September 21, 2014
7:30 pm
Oakbear
UK
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I pop by every few days and keep an eye on things, but yes activity here has gradually waned over time. I tend to respond to things rather than post new information.

 

I think online forums are something of the past to a degree. With the rise of social media, that tends to be the hub of interaction for most people, with particular interests being through that via groups etc. It doesn't have the organisation of old style forums often though. I guess i'm getting old!

 

The CoBM remains active,  and the forum never really being a good guide of overall activity. There are certainly no plans for it to become inactive. Of course this depends on a relatively small group of people, all of whom have jobs, families etc, which can divide their time. Anybody with ideas or able to offer help are welcome. :)

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Nietzsche
September 22, 2014
12:56 am
justingusler
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I have noticed from other experience with other forums that forums may be a thing of the past. Everyone it seems has since moved on to facebook groups and what not. Just an idea

September 22, 2014
1:35 am
nemissary
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I'll always stop by at least once a day.  I don't use Facebook.  My wife has eliminated most of her online presence due to her career and the wrong type of people trying to stalk her or get her private info.  I dropped it too in order to eliminate that link to her also.  I guess I just wish forums were still very active, just to get more interaction without having to belong to one of the GIANT social networks.

Just off-topic some: Seems social networks are just a double edged sword in many ways.  We found that deleting all of ours led to us hanging out and communicating a lot more face to face with our local friends.  However, it does eliminate the connection to large, faraway groups and organizations. meh.. need to find a good middle ground I guess.  Guess I'm old fashioned for wanting forums to be super active :P.  I'm involved in some hobbies that have very active "forum communities" and thought it would be the same here, but I guess most Body Mod types are much more tech advanced and fast paced :)

 

Love ya!

September 22, 2014
1:05 pm
Sommersett
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There is something to forums that creates an element of personal interaction which is not found in larger social media, IMO.  The energy of the conversations is largely dictated by active members, like yourself, and the people who care about this group will ebb and flow with you.  I suggest you try to research and expound on a topic, and Chris Carter will usually put up a link on the facebook page.  Creating a interesting thread always seems to get more interest, and you will notice more people commenting and stopping by the "old fashioned forum."

 

I want to do another jewelry cleansing ritual together…. Oakbear??

Everyone has something to say about the Mona Lisa until you're standing in front of it speechless.
September 23, 2014
7:46 pm
SasQuatch9585
USA
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Som raises a good point.  Maybe we're just being boring lately. lol

It would be nice to find something, some topic we could discuss on a regular basis, like a recurring feature in a newspaper.  However, I'm not sure what subject would need regular updates.  "This Week in Blood" sounds like a catchy title for a feature about industry news, but I'm not sure this forum is the right context for such a feature.  Nor am I sure who would write it or where we would get our industry news.  Furthermore, modified or not, would people who are not actively working in the industry even care about industry news?

Aside from larger social media sites, there also other forums that are competing for the attention of the modifying community, and as I understand, they are not focused on the spiritual aspect of body modification.  This forum clearly has a place for non-spiritual discussions, but the fact that it is the forum of the CoBM gives it a certain context which people may chose to avoid simply because they don't wish to discuss or learn about spirituality.  Also, the word "church" carries a certain connotation of arrogance and preachiness, of which I have never seen an example in this forum, but the connotation alone does turn people off.  Many people may assume up-front that any church's forum would be filled with people who are trying to convert others, and therefore they may be avoiding the forum in favor of social media because everyone knows FB doesn't preach at you, except with adds.

Bottom line…I don't know.

It would be cool to have a vibrant, energetic flow of discussion on this forum, but I'm not in favor of gimmicks (not that anyone has suggested anything like that).  If there's something more we can do in a legitimate effort to help people with their spirituality, I'd be all for it, but I think social media is killing small forums the same way Walmart killed mom-and-pop stores all over the country.

The fact is, social media has the advantage of one-stop-shopping.  One username, one password to remember, an endless variety of groups and people to connect with.  

Then again, perhaps we'll see increased activity here as church membership continues to rise.  After all, if the number of FB likes is any indication of current membership levels, we're still well below 10,000 members world-wide, and we rely exclusively on word-of-mouth, so most members of the mod community probably don't even know the CoBM exists.  In the coming decade, the number of people who know we exist will continue to rise, membership will continue to rise, and so, I believe, will activity on this forum.

I don't think this recent down turn in activity is a long-lasting trend.  More likely, it's just a natural part of the ebb and flow of activity we can expect to see from year to year.

Then again…What the hell do I know?

Sometimes I wonder if I can say anything in less than a hundred words.
September 24, 2014
10:04 pm
nemissary
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I do think the word "Church" probably keeps some people at arms length from CoBM.  In many peoples' minds it may remind them of many "Church-goers" that automatically judge others and preach that they are going to hell for being "different".  An unfortunate and common scenario here in the "South" USA.  However, since it is "of Body Modification" that may not be an issue after people think about it a little further.  

You may be right that some people may think that Body Modifications will be pushed on them by members of the Church or maybe that they will be looked down on if they don't have more 'extreme' modifications.  Dunno.  None of this has ever happened to my knowledge and I don't think it would happen here or be tolerated if someone acted like that. 

Could also be that the massive majority of people that get any Body Mod don't have any interest in the spiritual side of it or maybe do not recognize it.  I'm sure some people mistakenly think that to be a member of this Church means they couldn't practice their current Religions since many people have a hard time combining more than one belief system or think that all systems are strictly exclusionary of other ideas.

Wonder of there is a way that we could find out what a larger population in the modded community thinks of when they hear about CoBM?

I know my main piercer and some of his staff all want the 3 bars tattooed on them, so they are aware of the CoBM and support it in spirit, but I don't think they are involved with it in any further way.

I would be awesome if all the likes on the FB page were actual members.  heck! It would be incredible to have even half of that 10k people as active members.  Think about the huge amount of support and knowledge and experiences we could all share here!  Now, that would be exciting.

I also noticed that the other sites I have signed up for actually have no real input about the spiritual side of Body Modification.  Some of the sites have a nice amount of knowledge and experiences uploaded as FAQs on healing and care and other piercing concerns like migration etc. They are great for that info.  As I spend more time exploring those sites/communities, I also notice that they have a similar population # as CoBM when it comes to active members that regularly post or answer posts.  Maybe the Body Mod community as a whole is too busy running around and having fun in life to spend too much time in an online forum?  That can be seen as a good thing!

 

I'm glad to see a handful of CoBM people on here and posting.  I think it would be nice to have a weekly theme-post or something like that.  It may draw more people here if they see some very interesting and active conversations here on all aspects of the lifestyle(s).  I'll try to come up with some new topic next week, but I'm kinda boring when it comes to telling my stories or experiences.  All my good stuff is not fit for the public :P lol

Take care all!!

September 25, 2014
12:38 pm
Sommersett
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The idea of participating being the responsibility of someone else on some other site is a farce.  We are this church… the members who create the spark and plant strong seeds in the fertile soil of imagination for each other and our 'Mod Community' as a whole.  We decide what spiritual modification is and guide the opinion of people in our daily lives, thus creating a change in the hearts and minds which can continue to have effects long into the future.  Notice I'm not using terms which perpetuate the duality of human nature (ie:  good/bad, positive/negative) because I don't like to be pressured into a box like that.  Whatever is, just is.  A few days ago, a 9 year old girl asked me a whole series of questions (in front of her own Mom and several others) about my earrings.  Do they have backs?  Do they hurt?  Do they smell?  Do I wash them?  etc etc, and I answered each question carefully under the watchful eye of many non-modified peers.  I would have just popped one out and let her see it, but I have done that before and the person kinda freaked out!  Anyway, today I am going to bring along a clean earring for her to hold and look at.  We will see how it goes!  

 

 

Everyone has something to say about the Mona Lisa until you're standing in front of it speechless.
September 25, 2014
2:10 pm
nemissary
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It is sometimes hard to successfully have a discussion on the net.  My only point was that I wished we had more active people here.  Of course I wouldn't want tons of people that didn't even care about CoBM.  In that case I would rather it just be a few that actually were here for positive experiences and wanting to share.  I usually have a hard time expressing myself online because I over-explain my point or go off on a dozen tangents and wonder out loud about a hundred "possibilities".  It is usually just me unloading a ton of weird questions that pop into my head.

 Sommersett, you bring up an interesting situation about children.  I have been having some different experiences with children and adults that I've known awhile lately.  I'll post it as a different topic.

 

Thanks all!

September 28, 2014
6:29 am
Oakbear
UK
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I sometimes feel a responsibility to provide 'something' but it never really feels natural to try for me. If something pops up i post it, if not i don't. Of course things are more likely to spring to mind depending on interaction with others. The community is an organic thing, and ebbs and flows.

Thank you for you energy though guys. I've missed some of that exchange of passion and wisdom while things have been quiet. It's quite inspiring!

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Nietzsche
October 14, 2014
5:28 am
KendrahLi
Los Angeles, CA -818
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I admit I have disappeared off of anything that is forum based online for many months. I've been having a rough go of things with my health and mental state so signing onto this online has been in the way back burner and under a few miles of other things. This is the first place I came to check, and probably the only forum I remember to check periodically. I'd like to make more of an effort to get back to where I was when I first joined up. I do wish there were more on the nocturnal circuit for the irc chat, I'm more often found there or on phone apps like fb lol. 

-= www.khaotyk-artwerx.com =- Ex Ignorantia Ad Sapientiam; E Luce Ad Tenebras
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