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Not sure what to do... work related.
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September 1, 2011
11:42 am
Breanne Redin
Bath, Maine
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Forum Posts: 37
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March 3, 2011
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I'll just link you guys to my tumblr where I typed the whole story, if you don't mind…

 

http://brearune.tumblr.com/pos…..ons-please


 

Side note: Nobody I work with is aware of my choice of religion. I'm not sure if I should bring it up… or how. And I'm not even entirely sure if it was the nose piercing or not that did it… ugh. I'm just so torn about this, but feel like I shouldn't let it go.

 

Thoughts? :/

September 2, 2011
3:56 am
Oakbear
UK
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January 7, 2011
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Sorry i didn't reply when i was on yesterday, i can't get on tumblr at work! Anyway….

I am happy to talk about my religious beliefs, but it tends only to be when a relevant topic comes up or someone is asking (although this does happen a fair bit due to my appearance). That is not to say that one should feel the need to hide or be ashamed of their religion of belief, but i'm not really one for announcing things loudly (i fear this may be my Englishness sometimes though!). In your case, were it me, i'd not mention my beliefs unless they came up in conversation. I think that way you can have a discussion and add some context and background, whereas if something is passed around it can be prone to disinformation, especially in a less than friendly environment.

I think if you were going to say something about the nose piercing incident it probably would have been better at the time. Depending on your relationship with the supervisors that could have been humourous, or more serious, pointing out the parallels to other forms of discrimination and the fact a nose stud is not a good indicator of their ability.

I think it is positive and necessary to challenge discrimination, but it is often best done gently so others do not feel resentment or 'fight back'. Of course there is also a time and a place for more assertive challenges….

If it comes into conversation then think about how to challenge the prejudice and approach it with these people. You could even try and raise it by asking if they were serious or joking (as of course they wouldn't have been so close minded to really think that?!Wink).

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Nietzsche
September 3, 2011
9:52 am
Breanne Redin
Bath, Maine
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yeah, i was thinking the same thing , that i should have spoken up right then, even if it was just to clarify that they were talking about the piercing. That's why I'm biting my tongue to not speak up, I just think that in my shock over the whole thing ireally missed my opportunity.

Oh well. I'll  be ready if it happens again…

 

thanks for your feedback :)

September 5, 2011
8:12 pm
Charm
Bucks County, Pa
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August 8, 2011
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You definitely lost your window of opportunity there….But that's just
my view, I tend to be a person who is very out spoken. Just how ever
you choose to bring it up don't make it a issue that will cause you
issues at work that are unnecessary. Cross the big arguments when they
involve you yourself verses other people make logic?

Though
honestly stuff like that is why I gave up on retail, my one friend stuck
with it and she had to give up on her facial piercings after she rose
to manager. Its messed up because their rulebook states that it is up to
the managers in the store to enforce the policy. And when she was
promoted they were initially fine with her piercings{eyebrow, labret
and a monroe}, but later on they told her that she needed to remove them.
I told her she really should have fought it but in the end she caved
in.

Its just sad….

"There is nothing quite so thrilling as treading in the darkness on a step that isn't there"
September 6, 2011
12:19 pm
Breanne Redin
Bath, Maine
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I know, Charm, i really wish i had asked then. But I'm moving on from that now. And thats probably a good idea, only doing something when it's me… i just feel like it goes against me not to speak up if i KNOW something is wrong. but regardless, ill have time to figure this all out… before it happens gain (hopefully it doesn't, but lets be honest… it probably will.)

And i really liked this place because its not NORMAL retail. I mean, for the first year that i worked here we were allowed to have all the piercings and tattoos we want, as long as we didn't look threatening. And I'm not a fan of using them to look threatenig either lol so It was okay. But now all of a sudden the rules are changing and .. i dunno.

I casually decided to bring up CoBM with my assistant manager the other day, just telling stories that were unrelated to this, but I'm hoping it maybe makes her realize in the future how those thing might be wrong… or at least that they might offend *me* if nothing else. She took it well an laughed, asked me if i had other piercings i couldn't show (basically jokingly asking if i had the privates done haha) We get along really well, so it went great. I feel better about everything already.

September 9, 2011
2:27 pm
Oakbear
UK
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Glad you had a chat and feel better!

A bit of understanding can be very reassuring.Smile

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Nietzsche
September 26, 2011
9:58 pm
kreniac1968
danville,alabama
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im lucky that even though i work retail , i get to keep my facial piercings in.i work in a thrift store and will admit to our having plenty of traditional minded Christians, all of whom are used to seeing me and have never complained about my appearance. as far as i know, not a single customer ever has.i have my eyebrow, labret, snakebites, nose, medusa, smiley, and 14 in ears.i do tend to get lots of questions about why i have them.

October 4, 2011
3:40 am
astral_phoenix
Bel Air, Maryland
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October 3, 2011
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Hi Brearun,
From your blog, it really seems like a 50/50, and while it may have irked the skin the wrong way let's make a laugh and say maybe it was the tall skinny factor, or even her make up. I am lucky to work for a huge chain retail that loves diversity and hasn't said anything about my facial dermal, except try and keep your hair over it.
While granted we do live in a 'face value' its probaly best you set the religious convo aside until its brought up or really needed.

I hope this helps a little I've never had a company change on me before.
Brightest Blessings
Amanda

"People living deeply have no fear of death." – Anais Nin
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