my name is victor and i am a cutter… although i have not consciously or deliberately cut myself in almost six months i refer to myself as a cutter much in the same reference that alcoholics in AA refer to themselves as alcoholics… i started at about twelve or thirteen… i suffer from borderline personality disorder… my cutting was never a reaction to depression or emotion it was really more or less for curiosity… i took to it bc there is a masochistic side of me that really was drawn to it… in high school though it did become a reaction to emotional strife and frustration… i was never really into body modification until after i graduated… i blame it more or less on my intorduction to the emo/punk/counter- culture… but once i started piercing i tended to cut less and less… the body mods gave me the adrenaline and literal physical change i was searching for… i still cut from time to time but bc like i said there is a masochistic side of my psyche due to my BPD that draws me to it… i try to aim more for tattoos, piercings, brandings, etc now to suffice that side of me in artistic and productive ways… beign human i understand things wont always be easy… but i am a cutter nevertheless… i am actually getting my worse scar on my wrist tattooed over with the words “A Poorly Tailored Man-Suit” to remind me that there are other ways to deal with this… lol sorry to ramble but i just thought i would share my story and let you decide what you think…. ^_^

I have been a cutter for many years now. For me personally, cutting is a form of meditation. As is having any other form of modification done. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, in fact I don’t see how cutting differs from getting tattooed, pierced, etc. You are still going through the same process of voluntarily inflicting pain upon yourself to get something out of it. Whether it be art, jewelry, or a peaceful state of mind.

I think you are correct, most people getting tattoos/piercings/etc. are not looking at it like that at all. I find with myself however that piercing play, a tattoo session, or a scarification session have the same effects on me as my cutting and I have been modified on the grounds that I thought I needed a bit of meditating that day. It’s certainly not every time I get something done (as with my cutting is not always because I need to go to that space) but for me they can be and have been one of the same.